Review: Glory Revealed by Paula K Parker

 Glory Revealed

by Paula K Parker

Beauty Unveiled, the first book of the SISTERS OF LAZARUS series, introduces Martha and Mary, the two sisters of Lazarus, who couldn't have been more different. Martha, the elder, is plain and self-conscious; Mary, the younger, is beautiful and vain. One saw her value only in serving, while the other believed her outward appearance was her only asset. Their worlds were turned upside down when Lazarus offered hospitality to an intriguing new teacher named Jesus.

GLORY REVEALED: Sisters of Lazarus, Book Two picks up immediately where Beauty Unveiled ended, and carries the story of Christ to its glorious conclusion as seen through the eyes of those who witnessed firsthand the greatest story ever told.
Paula K. Parker's evocative writing draws readers in, allowing them to feel like a fellow guest sharing the sisters' wonder at meeting Jesus and his transforming power.

My Take:

When Lazarus and his sisters Mary and Martha invite the Teacher Jesus ben Joseph to visit one night a week before Passover, they know that they are inviting more than just a rabbi into their home. After all, raising Lazarus from the dead is only one of many miracles this prophet has performed.

But when Mary breaks open an alabaster vessel of spikenard that night and anoints Jesus' head and feet with it, the scandalous and wasteful act contributes to the untimely death of their friend. But, WAS it untimely? As WAS the act wasteful, or a pure act of worship to one who is far more than he seems? 

 

Content:

Drug Content:

G - While wine is used in this novel, it's squeaky clean. The Roman soldiers are accused of being drunk, but even THEY weren't having any excess..

Violence:

PG-13 - You cannot talk about or in any way describe the flogging by a Roman soldier, the abusive games by them, or the horrors of crucifixion, without getting rather gory. While this novel did a reasonable job describing the events of the crucifixion, the descriptions are not wantonly graphic, and fall far short of the Mel Gibson movie, Passion of the Christ. In one place the flogging, as it's going on, is dispassionately described as the torture it is, by one of the Roman characters.

Language:

G - While there is some swearing in this book it contains none of the common curse words in English, and involves oaths more than cursing. The language in this book is squeaky clean. 

Adult Content:

PG - There are quite a few conversations about marriage and the consummation of a wedding, but no details at all. A significant part of this book revolves around one of the characters and her fielding hopefuls for her hand in marriage, and the alignment of houses. In some ways the interactions could make the book more of a romance, but again, it's squeaky clean..

Christian content:

This is a retelling of the last week leading up to the Passover and crucifixion of Jesus. Christian content is heavily laced throughout. It covers the social and spiritual interactions leading up to that critical historical event from the juxtaposed perspectives of characters that are either aligned FOR, or AGAINST, the savior.

Final analysis:

This is a masterfully written, immersive vignette into the lives of Mary, Martha, and Lazarus, and the impact crater of Jesus Christ on their lives, both socially, and spiritually. The world-building is phenomenal. The plot is incredibly gripping, no matter how often you've read the biblical account. The character arcs are fully three-dimensional, and you get a better feel for the conflicts in such pivotal characters as Judas Iscariot, Mary the mother of Jesus, and Nicodemus. I couldn't put this book down, it made me late coming home from work, I had to finish it! Five Stars!

About the Author:

Paula K. Parker has been writing as long as she can remember. With a poet father, writer mother and a story-teller grandmother, she has always been comfortable in the world of words. Early training in music and theater led Paula to a life-long love for the arts. This passion eventually brought her to Nashville, Tennessee, where she—along with her writer husband, Mike--helped establish Carpenter’s Playhouse and Springhouse Theatre Company [formerly LampLighter’s Theatre].

A stint in the public schools, along with seventeen years of home schooling her five children, resulted in not only a quick wit and a unique sense of humor, but also the ability to effectively communicate ideas on a broad range of subjects to a wide age of readers.

Since 1995, Paula has been a professional freelance writer, with more than 1000 articles, sketches, plays, scripts, corporate copy-writing, nonfiction books and novels to her credit. She has written for such national publications as Christian Single, Christian Health, Clarity, Family Fun (Disney), Citizen (Focus on the Family), HomeLife, Living with Teenagers, the National Drama Service, ParentLife, Release Ink, PB&J, Profile and Bible Express magazines. She contributed to The Young Believer's Case Files with Stephen Arterburn (Tyndale), Thomas Nelson's award-winning Thomas Nelson Bible-zine, Becoming and their American Women's Bible. Online she has written for Crosswalk.com and was a contributing writer for the entertainment page at LifeWay.com for over twelve years. She is the Senior Editor for the online entertainment magazine, BuddyHollywood.com. Since 2013, she has written curriculum for the WinShape summer camp program.

Paula is an accomplished playwright, having written numerous produced full-length plays—which have been performed internationally—short sketches, and One-Acts. She is best known for her sparkling stage adaptation of Jane Austen’s Pride & Prejudice, Jane Austen’s Sense & Sensibility and Jane Austen’s Emma.

In 2010, her first novel was released, YHWH, The Flood, The Fish and The Giant, and the sequel, YESHUA, The King, The Demon and The Traitor, co-written with NY Times best-selling author, GP Taylor. Her biblical novel, SISTERS OF LAZARUS; Beauty Unveiled, reached Amazon’s Top Ten Best-seller’s list for biblical fiction. The sequel, GLORY REVEALED: Sisters of Lazarus, Book Two, hit Amazon’s Top 100 Hot New Releases in Christian Historical Fiction. The third in the series, GRACE EXTENDED, reached Amazon’s Top Ten Hot New Releases list for biblical fiction, and Amazon’s Top One Hundred List for Hot New Releases for Ancient History Fiction. Her novel, THE CARPENTER AND HIS BRIDE; The Birth of Hope debuted at #39 on the Bestsellers in Biblical Fiction chart.

Review: 2700 Miles by Norbert Reichert

 2700 Miles

by Norbert Reichert

After a nuclear holocaust, a mutated virus sweeps across the nation. Scientists find a cure, but not enough medicine is left to manufacture it. Frank and Simko leave their small community in a decrepit old semi truck, one of the few vehicles still working, to search through what is left of civilization for medical supplies.

My Take:

Radiation from a nuclear holocaust produces a mutated virus that threatens to wipe out what is left of humanity. Scientists at what's left of the CDC race to find a cure, but even after one is found, supplies are too low to manufacture it. Simko and Frank leave the shelter of the barricaded facility in an armored semi, to raid hospitals around North America, to retrieve enough supplies to save a remnant of society. But the anarchy outside threatens to destroy them at every stop. 

 

Content:

Drug Content:

PG-13 - Characters are attacked by drunken raiders. Crystal meth is mentioned, the effects of drugs described, as is getting high.

Violence:

R - There's a good deal of graphic and gratuitous violence in this book. People are hunted like animals, and skeletal remains paint a stark portrait of the depravity of the human soul. Wounded humans are gunned down, run over, burned alive. Human cannibalism is a concern. Murder for sport is common.

Language:

PG-13 - Jesus' name is taken in vain 6 times. God's name is taken in vain 25 times. Various other swear words are used periodically throughout. It's liberally salted with a significant dose of language. 

Adult Content:

PG-13 - There are multiple references to gang rape, sex slaves, and necrophilia.  Nothing occurs onscreen, though.

Christian content:

The Virgin Mary is mentioned, and there are several instances where characters pray. Some characters struggle with the overwhelming desire to do what is right, in a world where only the evil seem to survive. Even in such a harsh world, there are some who care for and help others, and even risk their lives for total strangers. Others seem irredeemably evil, finding entertainment in killing strangers for fun. One enemy is praying over his killed son, and the characters feel hesitant to kill him while he's praying.

Final analysis:

I have to admit, while the pacing of this book seemed slow in parts, (735 pages!) and very slow to start, it was a gripping adventure once the direct action of the main characters began, and they seemed pitted against insurmountable odds. Every city they visited seemed to have its own deadly traps, enemies, and roadblocks. Some characters were three dimensional, and displayed haunting backstories and fatal flaws, while others had no depth at all. The worldbuilding was immersive, the characters reasonably real, the stakes as high as they could be. I would have given this a higher rating except for the tremendous length and pacing. Four Stars!

About the Author:

Norbert Reichert was born in Budapest, Hungary, in 1977. He emigrated to Canada with his parents in 1989, and became a citizen in 1992. He went to college to became an electrical engineering technician, then soon after he started an apprenticeship in the elevator trade. Somewhere about 2011, he read a highly acclaimed book which he found unreadable, making him think that he could do better. That day he bought a laptop, and all the endless stories in his head started emerging on screen. While building the scaffolding of his first novel, he wrote the first two children's books in the Susie and Shadow series.

Review: Heirs of Power by Kay MacLeod

 Heirs of Power

by 

Kay MacLeod

Those gifted with power don’t get to choose a normal life.

Kitty Fairlow’s hunting skills come from more than years of protecting her secluded village. She inherited an ancient spirit, a secret long kept, even from her. Until now.

Grey-skinned creatures out of portals to a barren land rip Kitty away from her idyllic life. Her quest is to gather a group of heroes capable of defending their world against a race that devours life energy. Though she hasn’t prepared for this duty, she was born for it. She is a Constellation.

And she’s not the only one.

Kitty, along with a high-born dancer and snarky juggler who can’t stand each other, must find the rest of their kind soon. Because otherwise they’ll be dead before they even realise they are the last hope to save the world.

My Take:

When Kitty Fairlaw discovers a group of men trying to activate what looks like a magic urn, it tosses her headlong into an adventure of discovery - about who she is, and where her incredible skills as an archer come from. On the way she discovers that a group of humans were empowered by a dying race with supernatural gifts and abilities, each different, to defend their world from an evil race bent on invasion and destruction.. 

Content:

Drug Content:

PG - There are several instances of drinking, and one in which a girl's judgement is clouded by drinking, and she's almost taken advantage of..

Violence:

PG-13 - There is about as much violence as you'd expect in Lord of the Rings. A few decapitations, a hand gets dismembered, there is some torture, and some creatures get stabbed in the eye. In this kind of war-level medieval adventure, these violent exchanges are expected, but enough of it gets described to earn this a PG-13.

Language:

PG - A few mild expletives salt the pages in only a few places. 

Adult Content:

PG-13 - While there is no casual sex or unmarried sex, there are two scenes of attempted rape. Nothing happens, but a girl's outer garments are removed and she's tied to a tree. It's a fairly critical plot point, and it doesn't go further. 

Several times a male attacker is kneed in the groin. One time a joke is made with an innuendo attached

Christian content:

There's nothing specifically Christian about this novel. Yet there are some eternal truths that are exposed in its plot. This book is packed with examples of selflessness and self-sacrifice for the benefit of others, even for the benefit of others who have no idea there is a sacrifice being made, even for those who revile and persecute, and try to destroy. Loving your enemies. Giving or witholding quarter. Loyalty and a higher purpose are on display here, and trusting to the point of imminent death.
Families can find much to discuss here that would give them a chance to point so someone else who was willing to sacrifice himself. Just saying.

Final analysis:

This was an outstanding, well-written adventure story filled with epic fantasy elements of magic and swashbuckling, the things I love to read about. The world-building here is phenomenal, epic backstories that are mostly merely hinted at, a multi-dimensional immersive rollercoaster ride. The characters are fully three-dimensional, with abilities, fatal flaws, and character arcs to identify with. Five Stars!

About the Author:

Authentic characters, innovative abilities, serious snark!

Kay MacLeod is a fantasy addict from Nottinghamshire in England. She loves magical worlds and spends much more time in them than that boring real one.

If Kay isn’t writing, or thinking about writing, she’ll be immersed in reading, gaming, playing bass at church, or painting miniatures. She grew up addicted to Terry Pratchett books, Magic: The Gathering, and lording it over her fellow nerds as the DM in Dungeons & Dragons games. Fortunately, this gave her plenty of storytelling practice and made her grateful that all the characters do as they’re told now other people aren’t controlling them.

Kay’s gaming experience shines through in her works, from the Pokemon-inspired Maiyamon books to her epic fantasy, which readers say has a hint of a Dragon Age tale.

With character development at the heart of each story, they’re backed up by distinctive magic systems and a dash of sarcastic humour that gives Kay MacLeod her unique voice.

You can reach her at her website at kaymacleodbooks.com or follow her on Twitter @KayMacLeodBooks

Review: The Secrets of Islayne by Kari Lynn West

The Secrets of Islayne

by 

Kari Lynn West

A powerful island. A dangerous mystery. An impossible choice.

For centuries, the island of Islayne has given certain residents the ability to revive other people’s memories. These gifted individuals are known as luminators, and sixteen-year-old Ronan Saunders desperately desires to join their illustrious ranks. As he struggles against the prejudice of the old, powerful families who have an iron grip on the trade, Ronan falls under the tutelage of a reclusive luminator, rumored to be insane.

Just when his long-desired future is within reach, Ronan and his three friends discover a deadly secret on the island. As they delve deeper into the mystery, what they find forces them to question their loyalties, doubt long-held beliefs, and wrestle with the dire consequences of revealing the truth. Ronan finds himself torn between everything he loves and the only future he’s ever wanted. The entire fate of the lumination trade hangs in the balance of his decision. 

My Take:

Ronan Saunders faces a serious uphill battle trying to break into the esteemed ranks of the luminators, a guild of psychics with the ability to pull out and enhance fading memories... for a price. It is a very lucrative business, but one shrouded in mystery. The only place on earth where this ability seems to manifest is on the tiny island of Islayne, in one region of the island. And only certain families who live there seem to possess the gifts necessary to become a luminator. 

Yet Ronan possesses these gifts, though he is not from one of the guild families. His abilities and perhaps his close teen friends on the island give him some hope that he will be able to break into the guild, but all the odds seem stacked against him. Until, after a final crushing defeat, he is taken on by a rogue luminator as an apprentice. 

As Ronan's powers develop, and he gets closer to becoming a full-fledged luminator, one of his friends stumbles into a carefully concealed secret; a secret long kept hidden, one that will blow the entire luminator practice wide open. A secret certain powerful people will stop at nothing to keep hidden. 

Content:

Drug Content:

G - There is a little alcohol use, among adults only. 

Violence:

PG - There are a couple violent scenes, one where a person is knocked out from behind. There is a kidnapping and restraint, but mostly the violence is internal and psychic.

Language:

PG - A few mild expletives salt the pages in only a few places. God's name is used in this book, but only as an expletive a number of times.

Adult Content:

PG - There are a few innuendos in the work, but no encounters. There's a bit of teen angst, and a bit of romance, but nothing further.

Christian content:

Not really any. I wouldn't have any issue handing this to my kids to read, as they are all into their teens or beyond. It's an amazing adventure story, and a quick read. It has loyalty, friendship, trust, and self-sacrifice in it. Truth and justice are strong themes in this fast-paced adventure.

Final analysis:

I thoroughly enjoyed this story. Adventure, intrigue, mystery, and action. Good scenery, nice world-building, excellent plot twists and nice character development. For a fanciful getaway into adventure and suspense it's one to take home. Five Stars!

About the Author:

Kari Lynn West writes contemporary YA fantasy—normally while drinking far too much coffee. She likes to create character-driven stories that are set in the real world with a twist, weaving fantastical elements into everyday life. She lives in North Carolina with her husband and two daughters.

Review: Tracy's Choices by Max Elliot Anderson

 

Tracy's Choices

by 

Max Elliot Anderson

Tracy would be the first to tell you that she never expected her life to turn out the way it did.

Tracy was the first person in the State of Illinois to be arrested, convicted, and sent to prison for the knowing attempt to transmit the AIDS virus. How could this happen? Tracy grew up in a middle-income home in Rockford, Illinois. But Tracy made choices early in her life that would have a direct effect on her life in the future. She began to use alcohol very early. In high school, she listened to peer pressure as friends introduced her to drugs. At seventeen, she quit school and took to life on the street as a prostitute in order to earn money for her growing drug habit.

Tracy was arrested by Lt. Jim Mays in a prostitution sting operation. Lt. Mays was instrumental in Tracy’s decision to put her faith and trust in Jesus Christ. As a result, her life completely changed. However, the years of substance abuse and the complications from HIV infection were taking their toll. The Governor of Illinois later granted Tracy a full pardon so that she could come home to die. But she didn’t die, and Tracy used her last months to reach out to young people. This is a documentation of her efforts. Tracy’s Choices illustrates the point that there may be many forces at work trying to get a young person off track, but in the end, You are Responsible for You.

My Take:

Tracy Eichman didn't start out a criminal. She didn't start out an addict, an alcoholic, an IV drug user, a prostitute, an HIV carrier, an AIDS patient, a liar and a thief. And she didn't end there either. The true story contained within the covers of this extraordinary book is a riveting chronicle of the devastation alcoholism, drug use, and AIDS can leave in the life of a promising young girl or boy.

Tracy didn't end up in the pit overnight. She didn't wake up one morning and state clearly that she was going to set out to deliberately ruin her life. Her descent into the pit was a series of unfortunate choices, and this book takes us on a journey through them, in an attempt to give us a warning of where the pitfalls are.

Tracy did not, ultimately, end up in that pit. This book also details her stunning conversion to Christ, and her subsequent life, in prison, in an institution, and in hospice. Perhaps the story of her transformed life recorded here can give warning to teens who might be considering some of the life-altering choices Tracy faced. 

Content:

Drug Content:

R - The majority of this book covers a lot of ground, from alcoholism to street drug addictions, and the destruction that accompany them. Cocaine, Heroin, Alcohol, and Marijuana are mentioned, as the main character dealt with all of them. 

Violence:

PG-13 - Tracy's story doesn't pull any punches. The trauma she went through, the repeated rapes and abuse she suffered while a member of a bike gang, are tragic, but they are recorded obliquely, without any graphic and gory details. Where this tale does in fact get a bit graphic is in the details of what AIDS as a disease does to a body. 

Language:

G - There is no profanity in here, it's squeaky clean. 

Adult Content:

PG-13 - There is no graphic content in this book, though the work of a prostitute, the promiscuous life of a teen falling into temptation, the dangerous and sex-filled life of a gang member, are unpacked in sterile terms. 

Christian content:

The first half of this book covers a lot of deadly ground for a teen and young adult, but God doesn't seem to weigh into much of it at all. Yet Tracy's encounter with her arresting officer, a strong believer,  and the testimony of his home church, who opened their arms and hearts to this fallen and wayward prostitute, speak volumes of the grace and forgiveness of almighty God, and what it looks like on the ground floor, with skin on. Throughout this semi-autobiography, recorded by Anderson, there are clear calls for young people everywhere to learn from this girl's mistakes. It's not laced with scripture, but it's intended use is evident.

Final analysis:

I honestly wasn't sure what to make of this book by Max Elliot Anderson. I've read and reviewed some of his stuff before, and it's been Middle Grade fiction, exciting stuff, for boys, mostly. His self-definition is a writer of clean Christian adventure stories for boys, and he's very good at it. 

But this was a departure from the usual fare, so I picked it up with interest but some trepidation. What I found inside was essentially a journal of a young woman who had made a series of terrible choices, ones that destroyed her life, and the lives of others around her. It also contained her heart, a heart of compassion and care for the teens headed down the same dark path she tread. It is her warning cry in the night to avoid the path, to turn back, an echoing cry found on the lips of King Solomon in Proverbs 1:10-19.

And there, I believe is where we find the motivation for Anderson to pick up this story and share it. His heart is for young boys just about the age Tracy was when she first started hanging out with the outcasts and rejects, the pot smokers and misfits at her school. Like her, he wants to give them a clear call to stay away from drugs, alcohol, and premarital sex. To take the high road. 

I would love to have given this book five stars, but while the content was riveting and needful, the world building and scenery immersive, and the stakes high, the journal Anderson related tended to ramble and drag. So, If you are just looking for an interesting story about a prostitute, her adventures with drugs and the exciting life of an addict, you might want to move on. But for a needful book for teens, to warn them that all the excitement and glamor of premarital sex and drug use is a veneer over danger, suffering, and death, this book is an excellent choice. 

But in the final analysis, this book is about choices, Tracy's Choices, and more importantly, yours. So choose to pick up a copy and share it with a young teen considering chasing the wrong friends, and maybe they'll take warning. Four Stars.

About the Author:

Max Elliot Anderson grew up as a struggling reader. After surveying the market, he sensed the need for action-adventures and mysteries for readers 8 – 13, especially boys.

Using his extensive experience in the production of dramatic motion pictures, videos, and television commercials, Mr. Anderson brings that same visual excitement and heart-pounding action to his stories. Each book has different characters, setting, and plot.

Ten middle grade books are published, ten more are under contract, with several additional manuscripts completed. Young readers have reported that reading one of his books is like actually being in an exciting movie. He is also a short story staff writer for Knowonder,com Magazine.

Books for Boys Blog: http://booksandboys.blogspot.com
Author Web Site: http://www.maxbooks.9k.com/index_1.html

Review: Backpack to the Burbs: One Man's Epic Journey from the Pit to the Palace - by Stacy J Dodd

 

Backpack to the Burbs: One Man's Epic Journey from the Pit to the Palace

by Stacy J Dodd 

With no hope left, a young man wanders the streets, alleyways, and woods of his hometown with nothing more than his backpack. In his mind, his life is over. He’s let down his family, loved ones, himself, and God. He’s not even sure why he’s alive. Through the darkness, he pleads for something to happen to change his life. Little did he imagine that his journey would take him to a place he would never have chosen for himself.

Then God showed up.

Author Stacy Dodd shares his incredible story of how he ended up at the bottom of the darkest pit he ever could have imagined. But all that changed when an unintentional meeting with the God of the Universe transformed his life and set him on solid ground as a successful businessman and respected community leader.

My Take:

Once on a crash-and-burn downhill slide to hell, Stacy Dodd is now a respected community leader, author, speaker, and ministry facilitator. He takes the reader on a whirlwind ride through his childhood experimentation with drugs at the tender age of seven, through his addiction, despair, homelessness, and ultimately to the brink of suicide, at the point when all avenues were closed and all hope was gone. Stacy's cry out to God seemed to turn things the wrong way round, and instead of all his problems being solved, God took him straight to prison, on a suicide watch.

But as God usually does, He didn't leave Stacy there. He transformed him and gave him a new life, a new family, and a new purpose, called out by God to perform His work. Open the covers of this quick read and find out how God can radically transform a person and use him for His glory.

Content:

Drug Content:

R - The majority of this book covers a lot of ground, from alcoholism to street drug addictions, and the destruction that accompany them. Cocaine, Marijuana, Methamphetamines and crack cocaine are mentioned, as the author had struggles with all of these. 

Violence:

PG - The dangers of street violence and the near-death experiences of being shot at by enraged locals are touched on but there is no graphic violence.

Language:

G - There is no profanity in here, it's squeaky clean. 

Adult Content:

PG - The practice of drug dealers in getting girls hooked on drugs and then prostituting them or using them is touched on, but there's no graphic adult content at all.

Christian content:

God is the central character in this autobiography, and that comes through loud and clear. Without being preachy or depending heavily on scripture, Dodd takes a passenger observer approach to how God worked in his life, revealing at every touchpoint how and why God was working as He did. Stacy's quiet and firm faith comes through in every sentence. The work of God is revealed clearly on the tapestry of the beautiful transformation that is the testimony contained between these covers.

Final analysis:

I must admit that I was quite excited to get my hands on a copy of this book. Stacy's testimony has long been a centerpoint of conversation in the circles I run in, and having sat under him in ministries like Celebrate Recovery and Small Group, I can attest to the after picture of his walk quite well. 

As to the quality of this book, it's conversationally written in Dodd's engaging matter-of-fact style. It's fast paced, gripping, and encouraging. For anyone who has struggles with addictions and hangups, here is a book that not only tells you there's hope for you, it gives you a road map on how to get help. Well-written, fast-paced, engaging and informative, this is a book I'm glad to have in my library. Five Stars!

About the Author:

Stacy Dodd is a native of Missouri who published his first book in 2020. As a former homeless drug addict, Dodd's life transformed after he was introduced to the redemptive power of Jesus Christ.

As a result of his background, Stacy possesses a strong pull towards inner-city and underserved youth.  He founded The Hope Center Community Center, a non-profit organization, whose mission is to empower youth and give them a place to play, learn, and grow.  The Hope Center is a part of the Memphis Grizzlies mentoring organization and mentors over 100 youth per month in North Mississippi.  In addition, Dodd holds the position as the North Mississippi State Representative for the nationally recognized Celebrate Recovery, a Christ-centered, 12 step recovery program for anyone struggling with hurt, pain, or addiction of any kind. He also serves as the Vice President of Operations of Vertava Health in North Mississippi.

His hobbies include archeology, and he has an archeological site in Missouri with recorded discoveries of rocks and items from ca. 34,000 to 29,000 years ago. Dodd and his wife, Stephanie, currently reside in North Mississippi.

http://www.stacydodd.com

Review: Zombie! Haunted Mansion: Memoir of Jesse Jamieson by Zombie Origin Media

Zombie! Haunted Mansion: Memoir of Jesse Jamieson

by 

Zombie Origin Media

Stranded in the middle of nowhere, an unlikely group of high school friends embark on a series of adventures and mishaps to survive a remote zombie outbreak. With bloodthirsty ghouls trailing close behind, Jesse and his friends stumble upon an eerie mansion offering refuge from the zombie infested woods. But the residents of Krakuz Manor may be hiding a sinister secret more dangerous than the undead threat outside, or they might just be complete lunatics. Either way, Jesse and his friends must prepare for the impending zombie horde if they hope to survive their trip to hell. With no communication to the outside world for help, can a mismatched group of teenagers defend Krakus Manor against the undead, or will they fall victim to a living dead nightmare?

My Take:

Jesse's Prom date could not have gone worse. Literally. The girl of his dreams, Chloe, was asked to the prom by his best friend Bud, because he'd waited until the last possible second to ask her, for, you know, suspense. With poster and flowers in hand he ends up trapped asking the captain of the cheer squad to the prom. Someone who could not be less compatible. Then they all packed into Bud's truck with his friend Emu and his date Lexi, to head to Crystal Lake... er, Clearlake. Cheerleaders and Football jocks with the school nerd, all headed to a lake getaway after the prom. What could go wrong? Vhen you Vander in the Voods...

Jesse's date Becky manages to wreck the truck trying to play her vampire tunes, and they quickly run afoul of Zombies wandering in the woods too. They manage to find refuge from the rapidly growing crowd of zombies, in a mysterious old mansion hidden in the darkest part of the forest. But will the creepy inmates in the haunted mansion be any safer than the zombies milling around outside?.

Content:

Drug Content:

PG - There are a few references to crack. High school kids run off to the lake with a case of vodka. But it doesn't end up getting drunk, but being used for weapons.

Violence:

R - Oh wow. Head shots, eye-socket impalings, rampant wanton gunning down of poor defenseless zombies. Slaughtering them with bayonets and butter knives. There seems to be an endless supply of zombies to kill, and an endless supply of weapons to kill them with, from Russian Assault rifles and cannons filled with grapeshot to buckets of poo. One friend ends up with his hands cut off and other unfortunate things happening to him, from one mutilation to the next. Many of these are described in significant detail.

Language:

PG - There are a few cuss words, nothing serious. God's name is taken in vain um... many times, especially if you count the preponderance of 'oh my god' references throughout.

Adult Content:

PG-13 - There's actually not a bit of sexual content in this book, just a few kisses, no petting. But there are many titillating innuendos and a man's 'parts' are kept in a jar on the mantle, with a discussion about why they are there and not on, ahem, him.

Christian content:

Hmmm. One character refers repeatedly to Black Jesus. Several times the characters pray, as their situation gets more and more serious. One might consider that friendship plays a large part of this hilarious romp, but when the chips are down it seems to practically be every couple for themselves. A few times there is self-sacrifice, but if you enter this book for a moral lesson you likely won't get one, that's obviously not its purpose. There's about ten times people thank God for escaping, or some other minor miracle. One chapter references a priest with a taste for boys.

Final analysis:

I gotta admit, I started this book with some high hopes. The basic plot has been overused, one of high school prom kids out to get slaughtered by some Freddy Kreuger or Jason Voorhees. But these often are not laced in wit and humor, so I figured I was in for a treat.

The book is entirely written from Jesse's point of view, and the only content is conversation, onomatopoeia, and internal monologue in the main character's head. While this deep dive into first-person perspective is interesting in a short work, and can quickly put you into the quirky brain of an adolescent male, it becomes extremely frustrating trying to figure out what is going on without any description of action or surroundings. And repetitive uses of the Whack and Bang, Snap and Crackle, and pop, pop, pop, pop... you get the idea. It grew on me... like a rash where you couldn't reach.

So, here's my final word on it - this is a hilarious romp, a somewhat light-hearted if graphically gory humorous story; the characters are interesting and somewhat believable, the plot is sound, the action fast paced and the dialogue entertaining, the slapstick humor hilarious and the interactions interesting. However, the world-building was completely absent, the action confusing, the onomatopoeia extremely wearing and the pacing just dragged in the middle, and raced at the end. I found the gore to be a bit over the top, and would place the book based on that and the innuendos securely into the YA category. I'd like to give this Three and a Half Stars, but my scoring system is in whole numbers, so I'll round up. Four Stars.

About the Author:

Zombies! Looking for a zombie story with zombies and humor? Check out Zombie! Haunted Mansion and Zombie! Origins. Brought to you by Zombie Origin Media, a joint authorship of three idiot siblings writing complete and udder nonsense.

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